Meltdowns happen, it’s a fact of life with kids. And while they can be emotionally draining – for you and for them – with the right approach, you all can handle the hard moments so they become easier and easier to manage.
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Before the Meltdown
Get to know their triggers.
These aren’t the same for every kid. Maybe it’s transitions or sensory overload; maybe they feel especially tired at the end of the day. But recognizing your kids’ triggers can help avoid or manage meltdowns.
Notice when feelings are escalating.
Remember that their brains are functioning differently when they are experiencing overwhelming emotions and look for these behaviors:
- Trouble making decisions or responding to questions
- Refusal to follow directions
- Trying to shut out sensory things
- Fidgeting or pacing
Try distraction.
With some kids, you can interrupt the escalation before they reach peak meltdown. Try offering them an activity or putting them in charge of a specific task.
Be patient.
Give your kids some time and space to hear what you are saying. Try to speak calmly, slowly, and with short sentences.
During a Meltdown
Be reassuring.
Try to keep your own voice and body language calm and stay close by so they know you are there for them when they are ready.
Find some quiet.
This may mean turning down the lights, shutting off the music, moving away from a crowd, or anything else that may bring a feeling of calm.
After a Meltdown
Take some time to breathe.
Nothing needs to happen right away after a meltdown. Give yourselves a few minutes to just be quiet, to hug if they need it, and silently acknowledge that it happened, it’s over, and it’s OK.
Talk about it.
Talking about a meltdown doesn’t need to happen right away either, but talking through it later can help your kids understand what got them feeling so worked up. This is also a great opportunity to remind your kids that you love them, and that you will always be there when they need you!
Practice makes perfect.
We can’t stop difficult situations from happening, but we can help our kids be ready for them. Regularly practice taking big deep breaths together; do great big stretches reaching their arms as far into the sky as they can; and have your kids come up with other methods they think will help them remember that they are in control of their big emotions.